Ready to Bare All? (Or almost all.)

I know it's only mid-February and here in Florida the "cold" season is hitting its peak, so we're all cozy in our cute sweaters, stylin' boots, wide-leg pants and spruce coats, but in just 5 eensy weensy little months we will be wearing our underwear in public.

So, La Florida Chic has put together a Top 5 Pre-Summer Boot Camp List, to help all you fine mamas tone, tweak and tighten your bods in time for that ever-dreaded pool party thrown, naturally, by the co-worker who wears a size O. It's time now to hunker down, get in the proper mindset (self-discipline and self-love) and pick out the "goal" bikini you want to wear in July. Remember, 5 months is coming whether you like it or not - so just make up your mind to get in the shape you want. LET'S GO!

Top 5 Pre-Summer Boot Camp List:

1.
Buy, borrow, steal - and READ "Skinny Bitch" by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin.

This is not a diet book - it's a world-changing, life-altering, eye-opening journey of truth as told by two women who talk like truck drivers. And if you happen to agree with them, you will definitely get skinny - and, I believe, snag at least 684,000 good karma points in the process. (I read it in 1.5 days about a month and a half ago, and I still refer to it all the time - it's really that good.)

2.
Count calories.

It's the only way. I know. It sucks. Just do it. You will be blissfully happy and proud of yourself in 5 months. And your stomach will shrink and your body will be happier because it's not working so hard to digest a bunch of crap. *Get a Calorie Calculator Widget here, on the right-column sidebar ->

3. Measure your food with a deck of cards.

Forget all the other intricate formulas and equations - a piece of meat, carbs and any other non-veggie food portion at each meal should be no bigger than a deck of cards. This is NOT a joke. Of course, if you're a triathlete then you need to eat a lot more - but for the average Sally, this is your portion size. Just deal. (But indulge in as much steamed Broc, Carrots, Asparagus, vitamin-packed veggies as you want.)

4.
Break a sweat at least 5 times a week.

Whether it's helping your friend move from her 4th floor apartment, tearing a rug at the local disco, pole dancing, planting trees or actually pumping iron - let your body cry tears of smelly, great-for-you exercise as much as possible - or at least 5 times per week. Take the stairs. Park far, far, far away from the entrance. Give your dog an extra-long walk. Forgo the car for a bike ride to the store - since you're eating less, your groceries should fit in that little bike basket. :) Learn all the dance moves to "Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)" video by Beyonce - for truly hilarious and even bizarre inspiration, search YouTube for Beyonce tributes.

5. L-O-V-E Yourself like nobody's loved you before.

This means lingering over a delicious bed of fresh spinach and tomatoes on your favorite china with great music in the background. Exfoliating in the shower. Brushing your teeth for the dentist-recommended 3 minutes - every tooth and then flossing. Lowering your blood pressure and upping your aura's gorgeous glow by being patient, forgiving, compassionate and non-judgmental. (All this goodness will circle around the planet and come back to you in ABUNDANCE. It will. Just see for yourself.) Reading one intellectually challenging, inspiring or insightful article, chapter, cereal box, etc. every day (yes, this BLOG counts!!! - Or Salon.com, whatev). However you love yourself, make sure it's deep and meaningful - not cheap and tawdry, i.e. getting drunk from a bottle of cheap wine while watching Gossip Girl doesn't count! Just bask in the glory of your wonderful, unique, talented being. And don't give up! Never, ever, ever give up!!!!


*Here's my 5-month goal swimsuit!!!